Boyfriend Discovers That His Partner's Cat Is 'The Master Of Being Petty' In The Most Hissterical Series Of Interactions

Author image for Mariel Ruvinsky
Mariel Ruvinsky • Writer and Editor
Dec 31, 2023 9:00 AM EST

When people think of having a cat as a pet, they tend to think that it'll be easy. Cats are relatively low maintenance, cats sleep a lot, cats like to be independent. What non-cat owners don't understand is that while it is true that, for the vast majority of the time, your cats will be sleepy and lazy and independent, the rest of the time… cats will bring nothing but chaos into your lives. 

Some cats are intensely intelligent, and they will use that intelligence to outsmart you. Other cats… are not so smart, but their desire for mischief will win, and they will still manage to bring madness into your lives. And other cats… are not simply intelligent or mischievous. Some cats are petty, and if you slight them in any way, they will find the best way to make your life a cat-astrophe, and you will have no choice but to face their wrath. 

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  • 01
    r/cats u/yaNastee 11d Join My partner is learning my cat is the master of being petty Humor
    via u/yaNastee
  • 02
    So Kitty (7, calico, f) has never liked men due to accidentally being stepped on as a kitten. I warned my partner of this as we were coming up my driveway, his first time coming to my house many months ago. Get inside and this puff ball with permanent bed head saunters out of whatever hole we just summoned her from, gives me the dirtiest look I have ever received, trots up to my partner, and throws herself at this 6ft man's feet belly up. It wasn't even a trap, man didn't even have his shoes off
    via u/yaNastee

    "[S]he's a dilute calico, it's a rare colour variation of the calico coat. Rather than black, orange, and white, they're grey, caramel, and white (her paws, chin, belly and a stripe on the nose).

    Fun fact, calicos are about 1/100 and of all calicos, only 1/100 are dilute! That's only 0.01% of all cats."

  • 03
    Fast forward 8 months to yesterday. My partner and I haven't spent much time together the past month due to being insanely busy. We mostly just go out for dinner, watch a movie at his place, and then we're both exhausted so he drops me off at home. Well... You see, in Her Royal Highness Kitty's Court of Claw, it's a felony offence to be gone a week or more. My partner is now learning the punishment is to be glared at with utter disgust and ignored to the point she will leave the warm comfy bed a
    via u/yaNastee
  • 04
    He and I finally had a free day to spend together so we had a date night last night. Movies, cooking together, and let's be honest - he missed my cat. Well she spent the whole 7 hours coming up to him, chirping at me then glaring at him and leaving the room. Every time he tried to pet her she'd pull away so fast and look at him with such disgust and betrayal for his sins against her. He even knelt beside her chair and apologized to her, and I you not this drama major of a cat rolled over to turn
    via u/yaNastee
  • 05
    I suspect he'll spend the next week or two in isolation. My partner is so upset but I can't help but find it hilarious to see someone else be punished instead of me. Thought everyone would get a kick out of Kitty's calico attitude too. Edit: Here's an album of Kitty, complete with a pic of her and my partner, bed head, cat activation noises, and baby pictures!
    via u/yaNastee

    "He didn't grow up around animals so he's always asking me questions too about what body language and meows means what. She even had him trained in only a day to shake her dish when he feeds her so she can't see the bottom. They lowkey make me jealous sometimes, not even gonna lie"

  • 06
    Update: I forgot I made plans with my partner today and fell asleep with Kitty being my little spoon, swaddled in my arms and her head nuzzle under my chin. My partner let himself in and I woke up to his very hurt voice quietly saying, "ouch." I looked down and I swear on my Guinea Pig's ashes Kitty could not have looked more smug as she stretching and walked out totally ignoring him again. I am convinced she orchestrated this. He's still trying to plead his case with those squeezey treats which
    via u/yaNastee
  • 07

    "I like to tell myself she was cuddling me because my cramps were wild, but I'm aware she was just snuggling my heating pad."

    Cheezburger Image 9856667648
    via 44dedsca
  • 08

    "Even my roommate can't do laundry properly, she always has to take over for him."

    Cheezburger Image 9856667904
    via 44dedsca
  • 09

    "Lowkey looks like a beach babe... icon."

    Cheezburger Image 9856669184
    via 44dedsca
  • 10

    "I got slapped immediately after for waking her."

    Cheezburger Image 9856668160
    via 44dedsca
  • 11

    "Facebook irony..."

    On this day 3 years ago Jun 14, 2020. Might not have a man in my bed, Might not have a lady in my bed, But I do have a cat in my bed, and that is more than okay. Send and 4 others 32 1 comment Share
    via 44dedsca
  • 12

    "Now I have a man and a cat in my bed."

    Cheezburger Image 9856667136
    via 44dedsca
  • 13

    "'I'll just strut in my birthday suit And let everything hang loose' - Bruno Mars, Lazy Song"

    Cheezburger Image 9856667392
    via 44dedsca
  • 14

    "Let me take a freaking picture you rolly-polly little t*rd."

    Cheezburger Image 9856668416
    via 44dedsca
  • 15

    "Look up 'squish that cat' on YouTube."

    Cheezburger Image 9856669696
    via 44dedsca
  • 16

    "2 seconds before getting b*tch slapped while going pee. She doesn't even pay rent."

    Cheezburger Image 9856668928
    via 44dedsca
  • 17

    "Mild bed head. When she eventually rolled over her cheek fluff was all squished upward. Squish face."

    Cheezburger Image 9856668672
    via 44dedsca
  • 18

    "My alarm turns on my bedroom lights... She wasn't impressed."

    Cheezburger Image 9856669440
    via 44dedsca
  • 19

    "Toe beans, toe beans, toe beans, toooeee beeeaans."

    Cheezburger Image 9856669952
    via 44dedsca
  • 20

    "Gave her my old phone with a touch screen lock"

    Cheezburger Image 9856670464
    via 44dedsca

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